Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Unearthly (2011, Shout Factory)

August 16th brought us two more exciting MST3K episodes sold exclusively through Shout! Factory's website, as part of their Shout! Select line.  Both featuring B movie veteran John Carradine, the films couldn't be more different (well except the fact they are both terrible).  Red Zone Cuba is the first and the other is The Unearthly, which is the subject of this review.
The Unearthly features Carradine as a mad scientist (that's a first) who thinks he has found the fountain of youth.  Not literally, but he thinks he can stop the process of aging by implanting a gland into his subjects.  The patients/victims he selects are to have no relatives or connections to the outside world, avoiding any problems should the experiments fail.  As you would expect, things don't work out the way the mad scientist expected and his victims turn into horrific freaks.  Two of the patients figure out what's going on and try to stop the doctor before he can use them as guinea pigs. 
The Unearthly is undoubtedly a god awful turd of a movie, which proves to be perfect fodder for Joel, Crow and Tom Servo's hilarious criticisms.  As with many terrible movies, the title is misleading since there are no aliens in the movie.  The jokes come fast and make the task of sitting through this shambolic waste of celluloid not only bearable, but enjoyable.  Perhaps even more enjoyable though are the two shorts included before the feature.  The first is called Posture Pals and explains the importance of good posture.  The second is called Appreciating Our Parents and teaches you how not cleaning up your toys will make you a bad person.  Ah, the glorious 50s.  Nowadays I'm sure such public service announcements would involve Facebook bullying or saying no to crack but the times are different I guess.  Anyway, definitely pick up this fun episode for a laugh or better yet, pick it up along with Red Zone Cuba and you can get a free MST3K Stress Ball! ( click HERE to order The Unearthly direct from Shout! Factory)
RATING:  7/10

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